Monday, January 29, 2007

Networking, Conference

If you happen to get lucky with another librarian at a library conference, hang your lanyard on the hotel doorknob to keep your roommate from coming in and catching you in the act. No one should be subjected to seeing two librarians awkwardly trying to integrate their systems.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Anniversaries and birthdays, Celebrating

Keep a detailed log of your library coworkers' anniversaries and other miscellaneous milestones. Don't limit your celebrations to library events ("Joe, congratulations on your fifth year in the Cataloging Department!"). Your coworkers will be flattered to learn that you keep a detailed record of their extracurricular activities, romantic relationships, and rehab milestones.

[Editor's note: Today marks the two year birthday of A Librarian's Guide to Etiquette. Celebrate by doing something rude to a coworker.]

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Greeting cards, Disposing of

Never dispose of a birthday card, Christmas card, or a card of congratulations from a library colleague. Keep them filed away (preferably by the last name of the sender) as a record of who your real friends are. How else will you remember who said, "Have a great one!" in 1997?

Monday, January 08, 2007

Sick, Being

Sick days are for the weak. Drag yourself into the library despite any contagious colds, stomach viruses, or flesh eating diseases you may have. As an important information professional, you owe it to your library to be there barring an amputation, decapitation, or death.

Your colleagues and patrons will be so thankful that you came in to save the library that they'll hardly notice the reference desk telephone, public photocopier, and various doorknobs you've contaminated with your sneezes, coughs, and other secretions.

Thursday, January 04, 2007

Time, Taking your

Hiring an academic librarian is a big deal. Be patient and do not rush the process, no matter how excruciatingly slow it may seem. There is a reason that it takes longer than...
  • growing your hair out
  • filming a season of Survivor
  • confirming a lifetime appointment to the U.S. Supreme Court
  • delivering due process to prisoners at Gitmo
  • creating a new human life (from foreplay to delivery)
That reason may not be obvious to you, but there must be a reason.