Ideas of grandeur, Entertaining

Though business may be waning in your reference room with final exams wrapping up, don't let yourself be caught at the reference desk wistfully staring at your own blog, daydreaming of the day that someone will offer you a book deal for your concept. Even if you do entertain such ideas of grandeur, don't let others see you practicing your autograph for your imaginary promotional book tour of national and state library association meetings (where, of course, you'll be paid to speak about the silly self-importance of your profession and where each reading will end with everyone wanting to buy you a beer). Your patrons and colleagues just wouldn't understand.

Pet projects, Promoting your

As final exams loom, academic librarians should begin gearing up for the Who can be the most annoying about their summer pet project? contest.

The rules are simple:

1. Pick a project that no one else cares about.
2. Talk about your project all the time.
3. Assume that your project is everyone's highest priority.
4. Get defensive when no one will give you any feedback or comment on it.

Ready? Set? Go!

"So I'm going to be changing the screensavers on all the public workstations this summer, and I was wondering if we could all meet to go over the first draft of my proposal?"

Reference Interview, The

Part of being a good reference librarian is being able to understand what patrons mean when they ask their questions. Often, the patron doesn't express their information need in a clear and concise manner... thus the need for a reference interview.

For example: A patron may ask, "What languages did the Vikings speak?" In his mind, he has communicated what he thinks is a clear information need. The librarian, however, can interpret his real information need to be, "How can I tell if I'm wearing too much cologne?"

The librarian's mission is now two-fold: a) find languages spoken by Vikings and b) let this guy know he is burning the hairs out of your nose. The first part is easy. The second may require some finesse. Be a good librarian and cough, gag, put your hand over your nose, or ask him to wait outside while you search for his answer. If he doesn't get the hint, light a match and see if he bursts into flames.

Tissues at the reference desk, Supplying

Do not keep toilet paper at the reference desk. It's tacky. Toilet paper is for use at the toilet. The reference desk can be bad, but it's no toilet. Class things up a bit by buying a generic box of Kleenex. The ones in the floral box. If you really want to show the patrons that you care, splurge and get the ones with lotion.

Are you crafty? Crochet a Kleenex-cozy to keep those tissues warm and comfortable. Just be sure to color coordinate it with your library's decor. Nothing ruins a good nose-blow like a mismatched tissue-box cover.

Gloating, On

It is totally uncool to gloat to your coworkers after handing in your letter of resignation. Avoid...

• Proudly drinking from a coffee mug bearing your new school's logo
  
• Gleefully bidding an early formal farewell in various committee meetings
• Unabashedly not taking notes in meetings
• Audibly counting down your remaining days at your current job
  
• Being happy

Be considerate of your coworkers' feelings and at least pretend that you're headed to a place that's not all sunshine and daisies.

Blogger's ego, Feeding the

If you meet someone at a library conference and you identify them as an anonymous library blogger that you regularly read, never admit that you've heard of their blog and that you subscribe and post comments to it. It will only give them a (totally unwarranted) rock-star ego.

The 10 Hottest Occupations, On librarianship not being one of them anymore

Five to ten years ago, library schools were abuzz with projections about the importance of information professionals with MLS degrees and their roles in the New Economy. This line of thinking is as dated as the term 'information superhighway' and now you are faced with the startling realization that your skill sets aren't needed nearly as much as the dean of your grad school had promised. You read magazines that compile annual lists of the hottest job trends and you see that an MLS degree is sandwiched between 'Clerk at Doctor's Office' and 'Phone Sex Operator,' though either of those professions would probably pay better. And with every passing day, your technical skills become more outdated and less relevant to the work force at large.