Work, On dumping a whole bunch of yours onto someone else's desk the day before you go away on vacation which also happens to be MY day off

Go ahead and leave a nice healthy pile of work on my desk the day before you go away for a couple of weeks, you sniveling coward. Make sure that you do all of the easy stuff and leave me to do the work with the highest ass-pain-to-hours-it-takes-to-complete ratio. Go ahead, I won't mind. But be warned, if I find another gig while you're gone, I'm going to shred the work and leave it on your desk in a big plastic bag. Odds are that won't happen so, instead, you better not leave behind anything of yours that is easily breakable. I'm sure those cheap trinkets on your desk would be impossible to replace.

Co-Workers, On ways to annoy the annoying ones

After compiling a mental list of annoying co-workers, find out what irks the living daylights out of each one and then proceed to do that thing. Do it as often and obnoxiously as possible. Do it every day. Don't just do it, amuse yourself by thinking of doing it again. Do it for yourself. Do it for librarianship. Do it for the kid who was born without an immune system. Do it for your country. Do it for me!

Nemesis, Choosing a

Every librarian should identify a nemesis within their library. This person can bear the brunt of all your frustration, moaning, and general ill will. Think of this colleague, patron, or pesky employee as the mascot for your misery. No search committee required.